It’s been a minute, hasn’t it?
The past month - actually, almost 2 months - have been a whirlwind.
A sampling of a list Millennial keywords includes:
Let’s talk about this last one. Passion - it’s everywhere.
A friend recently told me that she appreciates how intuitive and open with my feelings. I couldn’t help but chuckle in response, reflective of my surprise to her comment. I have always thought of myself as a bit bundled up with my emotions. As I thought about what she said, I realized something noteworthy. In friendships and familial relationships, her sentiment is valid. For some reason though, in romantic relationships I fail to fully express my emotions. Proof of this is ‘feedback’ from my last relationship to be more open and vulnerable - which was true.
I’m sure you’ve been asked the question before, whether in a job interview or survey or self-questionnaire: what are you most proud of?
My initial reaction to this question is discomfort, for a few reasons. First, no matter how I answer the question I feel that I am a total brag. Second, feelings of inadequacy pop up - “will my answer be ‘enough’?”, “is this answer only coming from a place of privilege?”. Third, I haven’t figured out the depth of the emotions of pride and how it shows up in my life (how do you identify when you are feeling proud?).
Yesterday was my 23rd birthday. Cue all of the songs, from 22 to What’s my Age Again. I thought about playing 22 the night before my birthday, but rendered it to be trite.
I typically have ambivalent feelings about birthdays.
As part of the ongoing effort to stay connected with friends across the country, I called my best friend from college the other night to catch up on her recent move for her job. We got on the topic of cities, a common discussion item among us. I noted that I still don’t feel that DC is ‘my’ city. Do you know what I mean by that? As in, if a city was a person, how would its personality vibe with yours. Returning from my recent trip to Colorado, I experienced the same feeling I’ve gotten each time I return to DC from a trip: a desire to find a city that is more me.
Recently, I finished reading “How to Fail At Almost Anything and Still Win Big” by Scott Adams, creator of the Dilbert cartoon. This book came highly recommended by someone whose opinion I value, so I immediately requested it from the library. Despite my lack of knowledge on Dilbert, I was excited to read this book because I knew there was a focus on achieving success and setting yourself up for it properly, which is relevant as only a few weeks ago I started on a new team at my company and have a totally new routine.
A few months ago, when I wasn’t very happy at my job (or generally, for that matter), what seemed like a golden opportunity landed in my lap, in the form of a LinkedIn direct message by a recruiter at a dream company.
Beyond the fact that this was probably too good to be true, I pursued the opportunity to see if it was worth my investment. I had several rounds of interviews — which seemed almost too easy, a concern of mine considering the esteem of the company.
Before I could blink, I sat with a job offer staring at me
Hi! Long time no chat.
It’s been a busy month, to say the least. Since Easter, I broke up with my boyfriend of two years, received and rejected a job offer halfway across the country, went to Cabo with friends from college, and ended up in Tampa with my family. So I hope you understand why I went a bit AWOL on y’all. But great news: Here we are.
After I returned from my trip to Mexico, my headspace was a bit fuzzy. Being around skinny bikini clad girls will do that to you, I think. It brought up some body image issues and I noticed that negative self-talk was creeping in. Lately, I’ve been trying to be more positive and on the up and up lately, so this was not welcomed.
In a moment of action, I simply deleted the Instagram app off my phone to see what it’d be like to not check it compulsively for a few days. I can’t remember a time when I didn’t have Instagram; it rose exponentially in popularity when I entered college and quickly became my preferred choice of social media.
Did you ever watch the show Friends? I can’t say I’ve watched more than an episode, but it’s my roommate’s all time favorite show. And back in the good ole’ days when I was recruitment chair of my sorority, we did a Friends themed recruitment round - we took the friends theme song and changed the lyrics to be sorority-esque. So now, I know the theme song all too well (both the actual version and the sorority one).
Sophomore year of college, I was in a big slump. And I wasn’t alone in how I felt - most of my friends were going through their struggles as well. We eventually realized we were all sort of going through the same thing, even though our struggles materialized in different ways: control issues with food, being lax on hygiene, turning to drugs - we really ran the gamut with our group. We all eventually bounced back; although I cannot pinpoint the trigger that both caused and resolved our slumps. I think it’s a natural progression; for each high there is a low, like a cycle.
In college, I was fortunate enough not to be terribly affected by the ups and downs of college, from job offers to failing tests. I had the cool, calm demeanor. I thought it was only smooth sailing for me - but sadly, I was wrong.
Upon starting my job, I’ve experienced bouts of anxiety - something I haven’t had to deal with before.
My parent’s home in Buffalo is not glamorous. There also isn’t a lot to do in the city, and the weather isn’t usually great. Despite these things, I cherish each time I’m able to go home. My home-home, if you will. Not my home in D.C., but the OG home - my childhood crib.
I love going home for a few reasons:
If you haven’t browsed the personal growth section of Barnes and Noble lately, let me bring you up to speed: books on habits are IN. As a self-described personal development junkie, I’ve enjoyed learning more about habits. One of my favorite books on this topic is Better than Before, by Gretchen Rubin, which focuses on mastering habit in our everyday lives. This book has been great not only for helping me take inventory of my habits, but also look into how habits tie into certain areas of my life, such as money.
I’m going to preface this post by saying that I’ve only been living my best post-grad life for about 3 months now, so one could argue I’m still a bit in the weeds of coming to my own.
One of the hallmarks of my personality is that I’m a steady eddy.
Most people look back at the year and go, “Oh, thank God it’s over - the next one will be better for sure! Next year is my year!” I must say though, I think 2017 was a great year overall. And I’m not saying it just because 17 was my favorite number when I was young…
After graduating college, I knew right away that I would need to make and stick to a budget in order to spend wisely and start saving. My parents raised me with the mindset to be a saver not a spender, which is something I am grateful for, that has also served as an unconscious pressure for me to start saving as soon as possible. I recently started my full-time job, meaning I now have a paycheck every two weeks deposited in my bank account. I want to hold myself accountable by making sure my money doesn’t leave my bank account as soon as it comes in, so I knew I needed a budget.